Verse 1
I′Ve Got A Stump-Legged Lady, To Thump Out The Backbeat Bumps.
I've Got A Bald-Headed Bassman, Cos He Really Hits The Ceiling When He Jumps.
I've Got A Fat Joan-A Player, Oughta Hear Him Howl 'Hosanna′ When He Swings
He Doubles Harp And Harpsichord, But If He′S Feeling Bored, For A Treble He Will Double Chins.
Chorus
I'm King Cripple In The Band, And Everybody Is The Joker In The Pack
We′Ve Got A Hunchback Drummer, Just In Case We Get Too Laid Back
We Say The World's A Pavement Oyster, So We′Re Gonna Hoist A Union Jack.
Verse 2
The Lead Guitarist Is A Pigmy, And Shortly He'll Quick Rig Me Up A Riff
The Roadie Gets His Rocks Off But If He Takes His Socks Off, Don′T Whiff
They Cut His Feet Off, They're Athletic. He's A Walking Anaesthetic For The Blues
And It′S Amazing How He Sways To The Triple Band Off Stage, In His Seven Inch High, High Stamp Smelling Shoes
Verse 3
The Audiences Panic, When My Sax′S Schizophrenic Blows
He's A Double-Headed Giant, And He Calls Himself A Bryant And A May-Be
You′Ll Half Believe It When He Lights Up, Stuffs Two Saxes In His Gob And Goes
Chorus
I'm King Cripple In The Band, And Everybody Is The Joker In The Pack
We′Ve Got A Hunchback Drummer, Just In Case We Get Too Laid Back
We Say The World's A Pavement Oyster, So We′Re Gonna Hoist A Union Jack
Outro
We Say The World's A Pavement Oyster
So We're Gonna Hoist A Union Jack
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