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Charming, As Performed By Pattycake Feat. Jordan Litz
Written By Layne Stein And Anthony Wakim
Chords By Ingmar Ollieuz
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Released As A Single In April 2026
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Intro
You Know They Named Me, Charming
Not Charles, Not Clifford, Not Kent
Just Charming, No Last Name
Like I'm A Perfume Scent
"Just Find A Girl!" My Father Said
And Then Produce An Heir
Well I Have The Girl.... Well, Had
Where Did Charming Get Me?
Nowhere
Verse 1
I Enter A Ball, And The Whispers Begin!
"He's Dashing, So Handsome! Would You Look At His Grin?"
I'm Just Supposed To Smile, And Give The Girl A Twirl!
Forget My Plans For A Democracy, Girls Just See Keys To The Monarchy
Verse 2
Does Anyone Ask What I Think Of The War? Nope!
Or Taxes, Or Roads, Or Literally Anything More?
They Want The Handsome Trophy Man
And Not The 5-Year Plan!
I Tried To Lead With Good Diplomacy
All They Want Is Pomp And Pageantry
Pre-Chorus
Then, There's Her. The Girl Who Lost Her Shoe
And Disappears Like Every Plot Hole I See Through
Chorus
I'm More Than Just Charming
I'm More Than A Smile
I'm More Than The Arm Piece, That A Princess Needs
To Walk Her Down The Aisle
I Balanced Our Economy And Opened Trade Last Year
I Cut The Tariffs
But That's Not What They All Want To Hear
I'm Just The Guy To Search The Land
With Fragile Footwear In His Hand
I'm More Than Just A Charming Prince For A Girl!
Verse 3
A Boy Meets A Girl But, He Finds Out She's Dead!
My Job Is To Save Her, So The Plot Moves Ahead
I'm Just A Prince, A Noun, No Name!
Exist, But Don't Complain
Find A Princess That You Love But Then
You Find Out There's Seven Other Men
"Wait What?"
Verse 4
A Princess Is Cursed, That's The Setup I Guess
A Girl, A Witch, A Prince
I Mean, That's It More Or Less
Just Save The Girl, That's Great
No Plans For Healthcare, War Or State!
No, You Let The Princess Do The Feeling
Your Job Is Just To Do The Kneeling
Pre-Chorus
And By The Way, We Picked You A Bride
Your Future's Pre-Agreed!
But Now I'm Starting To Wonder
Is This What I Really Need?
Chorus
I'm More Than Just Handsome
I'm More Than A Prop
I'm More Than The Guy In Tights On Horseback
And Whose Name They All Forgot!
I've Smiled Through Hypocrisy To Last Me 10 Careers
And For God's Sake, No More Royal Balls
They're Traps With Chandeliers
A Kiss Without Consent Is Gross
So I Guess She'll Lay There Comatose
I'm More Than Just A Charming Prince For A Girl!
Bridge
We Act The Role, And We Wear The Crown
We Lift Them Up, But They Hold Us Down
I Could Stop Global Warming, But No One Would Care
In A Princess's Story
Is The Prince Even There?
Chorus
I'm More Than Just Charming
Do I Get A Plot? Probably Not
I'm Just A Face They Frame
Wait, What's His Name?
I'm The Hero They Forgot!
So If You Want A Fairytale, Go And Buy The Book
But News For You
The Prince Inside It Only Has One Look!
Stand Tall And Smile
Don't Offend
That's Where The Royal Training Ends
I'm More Than Just A
Handsome, Gallant, Mindless, Charming Prince
For A Girl!
